Lake Victoria Venture (UB#10)

Yesterday I walked along the shores of Lake Victoria with a group of people from my practicum. We wound our way through the fish market and then sat on the shore and watched the sun set as we snacked on fresh fried tilapia. Lake Victoria- like most large bodies of water- is beautiful. The lapping of the waves brings a sense of peace even to the busy (and somewhat smelly) marketplace. I thought it was beautiful. Then I noticed the awe of one of the men I work with, he is about sixty-five years old but his excitement was similar to that of a five-year old boy who has spotted a sweet tractor. He watched in awe as boats came and went, pondered where the boats could be going, and ended with a short speech about how he could not understand the complexity of living near the water. At sixty-five he had only been to the lake once before and had never ridden in a boat.

I am privy to a hoard of experiences unimaginable to some people. Yet my life is not fuller or deeper than Mr. Senjuwa’s. Those experiences in themselves have not given me greater wisdom or understanding. Standing there on the lakeshore I experienced maybe one quarter the joy that Mr. Senjuwa was experiencing.

May my past experiences never dull my ability to rejoice in the little things because those little things probably aren’t as little as they might seem.

(Photo Credit: this photo was stolen... from google... sorry)

The Joy of Knowing

We are so intricately made that we don’t even know ourselves. How mind-boggling is that? We blink and suddenly we’ve changed… yet somehow we convince ourselves that we know and understand each other. That we know all there is to know about the friend we’ve known for three months or a year… or at least all that is worth knowing. Man. There are so many layers to every person I’ve ever met. How can I continue being content knowing people for four months and then moving on?

I want to settle into one place. One set of people. I want to spend years and years, the rest of my life really, focusing on knowing one set of people. And I don’t just want to know. I want to love. I don’t want to back away when I figure out that you’re not perfect. I want to embrace that imperfection because it is exactly the same imperfection I see in myself. We’re all walking around missing the mark and we’re all covering it up. I want to be with people who know my depravity. I want to live into the truth that I am corrupt, not because I want to be more corrupt but because I don’t think that corruption can be escaped until I admit it and I don’t think admitting it to myself carries nearly as much weight as allowing other people into my life to see me for who I really am.

I wasn’t made to run to God alone. I can sometimes convince myself that my relationship with God was meant to be a ‘me and God strolling through a quiet meadow’ type relationship. Then I mess up. And God uses someone else to turn me back in the right direction. God uses my friends, my acquaintances, my professors, even strangers to turn me around- to fill me up with hope. Only when I enter into the stampede of people running towards God do I ever seem to experience meadow-moments. I want this shared experience to be deepened by time. We are dreadfully wicked and delightfully liberated by the same God. With this knowledge, why would we not want to strive for greater knowledge of who we are- together? Simply put- let us endeavor to be friends.

Story Time (UB#9)

Story of the day: 

Sometimes a Ugandan guy will want your number.

Like. Really-really-really want your number. 

At first you wont want to give it to him. 

Then you really wont want to give it to him. 

Then he will give a 30 minute speech on how phone numbers represent relationships (because clearly you aren't friends until you are willing to share your number... but as soon as you share your number, then you are brother and sister... and also, sharing your Ugandan number will help you to remain in contact even when you go back to the United States... it all makes sense). 

Then you still will not want to give it to him. 

Then he will tell you that you seem like a very good person. 

Then you will cave and give him your number. 

Jokes. 

You will then decide that you should probably run away.

(but before you get a chance to run) He will tell you that not giving him your number is mis-representing white people and next time a white person asks for his number he will not give it. 

Then you laugh. And tell him how sad that is. 

Then your normal Ugandan friend rescues you.

The End.

(yes. this blog should disappoint you considering it comes directly 

after me telling you that I wanted this blog to be quality.)

Bllogoogoggging

This blog is about my blog. It is so easy to feel like I ‘should’ blog, like for some reason it is another obligation in my life. I put blogging on my to-do list, but I don’t think that is actually where it belongs. Let’s be honest, there aren’t very many people who read this blog, and I love the people who do, so why would I want to force them to read junk? I want this blog to be a place where I can share what I’m learning and not a place where I have to fabricate something so that people think I am learning. I don’t want to have a daily blog, or even a weekly blog, because I don’t want to blog just to blog. I'm sorry for the blogs I have posted that have been pointless. My goal from here on out is to only post blogs that actually help you to know more about what I am learning and experiencing… so if the blogging gets sparse, so be it.

When Leaving is Fashionable (UB#8)

I see a trend among my peers towards fixating on leaving home… we are confused when people do not have a plan to leave the place they grew up. There are so many issues leaving home has forced me to face that I wouldn’t take back… but I don’t think seeing more of the world will somehow make your life ‘better.’ It will probably force you to expand your mind and yes, travel will be a temporary escape from what might be eating you up, but you’re going to find more problems and then you’re going to go home to problems and you’re going to be carrying remnants of the problems you found along the way.  Those problems might be the fact that you have found out that your own worldview is not unquestionable or simply that in coming home you had to leave friends you love. Travel is not a cure to life’s problems and if I’m correct in thinking that that is how it is often portrayed something needs to change. We cannot go on lying to ourselves about how wonderful it is to travel. Being gone from home for a prolonged amount of time is incredibly difficult and sometimes even painful yet we continue to pass on the lie that it is all fun and games. It is easy to pass on funny stories about crazy places and unusual people-- it is harder to pass on the power of the emotions that will sometimes overwhelm you when you find yourself thousands of miles away from anyone that has known you longer than two months. We ache to be known by others. Leaving home means sacrificing the craving we have to experience love through being known. We should not go on trying to share the experience of leaving home if we are not willing to share both sides of the experience. It is lying when we are not willing to admit that our experiences away from home are not only positive.  

Rural Homestay (UB#7)

It is really difficult to know where to start writing about something that I haven’t even really begun to process. I spent the past week in rural Uganda. I stayed with a wonderful family, ate wonderful food (even if I never want to see another groundnut, peanut, or anything that in any way resembles either), and somehow I think my brain grew. I learned that a hut is a home, that making less than $2 a day does not mean you’re starving, and that I really don’t like ants/spiders/snakes/rats. I’m sure I’ll be blogging more in the next couple weeks, but for now, the thought of thinking about the past week makes me feel tired… so here is a poor quality video that is probably a better representation of the past week than anything I could say right now!

jokes. that video probs doesn't work. just gonna have to wait till the internet is stronger.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VXqtj36DqQs&feature=youtu.be